Well, I guess I owe a little explanation for how I got from point A to point whatever the fuck this is now. I've lost count.
I'm originally from a small little town in Georgia called Stellaville. There's not much there. Only about 8 people and 12 dogs. All dirt roads, debauchery, and no cops. It was a fucking great place to grow up, learn how to shoot guns, and drink whiskey. I lived there until I was about 12 years old, and then moved around to some other small towns throughout GA. I went to a private school (yes, I know, so shoot me) until the 11th grade, and goddammit if I didn't hate it.
Let me explain that a private school in a small southern town is like a fucking cesspool for ignorance, Jebus, racism, cliques, and blatant discrimination against anyone with a lick of logic or a different outlook. The bastards wouldn't even teach us evolution. It scares me to death thinking that people actually pay these fuckers big money to keep their kids just as blind and ignorant of the world as they were when they were 6. I hate it that for 10 years I was a victim of this shit, but at least I managed to escape, figure out what the fuck this "evolution" thing was, stop talking to this imaginary "Jebus" guy, and get some real insight into this nutty world.
I didn't really get my first taste of a "life changing event", epiphany, moment of clarity, or whatever the hell you want to call it until summer of 2006. When I was the most miserable, depressed 16 year old in the world just trying to figure out why I didn't fit in with the "cool" kids at school with their camo, polos, and functional families; I got a letter. Yes, a fucking piece of paper with some important looking designs and scribble on it was the start of the snowball. Everything from that day to this point in the story has snowballed from that little letter.
I was going to Hogwarts. No! Fucking better! Europe! France, Switzerland, Austria, and Italy! I'd been recommended to go on a 21 day student ambassador program for the small fee of 1 metric dick-ton of money. Luckily we just happened to have one of those due to some court bullshit my stepdad was kicking ass at. And my mother, being the most awesomest woman in the world, pretty much wouldn't let me back out of this one. It seemed like such a cool idea, but the leaving date got closer and my tiny, fragile mind started realizing I was about to be thrown into 3 weeks of scary social interaction with 43 people my age, who I'd never met. (Keep in mind I was still innocent(ish) at this point in my life and had never been any further from home than vacations in FL with family.)
But the trip, despite my fears, turned out to be the turning point in my life. I got back to the states with 43 new and amazing friends. And goddammit if I didn't almost not come back. I fell into the deepest depression ever for a few months after I returned. I had tasted the world and I wanted more. I changed high schools twice after the trip. I wanted to meet more new people, make more friends, find some new adventures and interests!
So I gladly embraced change. And after high school, shit started to get real... then real weird...